Your a good Girl! Have some cake?

After a long day of the the usual activities of chores, child raising, cooking, tired children at bedtime, more chores and nearly severing my toe after dropping a large kitchen knife, I stared into the pan of freshly baked brownies, affirming to myself that I am a good girl. I deserve this. Isn't it ridiculous? What does being good have anything to do with brownies? This is a severely ingrained thought pattern that most of us carry. There are way too many of us that turn to sugar (subconsciously or not) looking for that approval or praise that we are good. Sugar = feeling good.
 This is something I have been aware of while consciously raising my own brood. I try never to use food as reward or punishment. And if I catch myself, I'll quickly correct it. I don't want my kids to associate good or bad behavior with food. I have sat around many tables listening to parents tell their children that if they are good and eat all their dinner than they may get dessert. Or I've heard a parent say no to their child's request for a cookie because they didn't deserve it, based on a previous "bad" incident. I realize this bargaining tool may come in handy, but we must realize that we are potentially setting our children up for unhealthy eating patterns, food obsessions, weight problems and failure in dieting later in life. We need to model to our children other ways. I hope I don't sound preachy, I am working on this too and carry a lifetime of food obsession with me! But what if reward for doing a good job was the FEELING we got from doing it well. Or what if we lived our lives full of joy, and got so much pleasure out of doing what we loved that we wouldn't need to search for that feeling in the kitchen. We all know that a container of ice cream or the entire bag of cookies or chocolates may seem like a good idea, but it never really fulfills, does it? Food is about nourishment not reward or punishment.

I should never deserve nor be denied of this.